Magical Wands

When I was little, my mom would read me bedtime stories every night. It was our thing; our bonding time. In a way it taught me how to read by just listening to her voice.   While she read, she would give each of the characters a different voice and it made it more realistic for me. The books that I remember the most were the Harry Potter series.  My mom and I together read books 1-4 and enjoyed every single one of them. As she was reading the books, I became so into the characters and the book itself. I started to dress up and think I could cast spells and other things. I remember I asked my mom if I could go to Hogwarts instead of school that fall. Instead of sending me to Hogwarts, she signed me up for a Harry Potter camp at Poricy Park.

I remember for my first day of camp I wore my Harry Potter cloak and hat that my aunt made me.  It had the characters all over it and it was a royal blue with gold trim. I wasn’t the only one doing this. At 6 years old, we weren’t out to impress. I walked into the science center where the faculty decorated the room just like the Great Hall and stared in pure amazement .Everything was glittery and the house banners were hanging from the walls. It was a small group of us. We were all about 6 or 7 years old and so excited to be there. After the official greeting, we had to be sorted into a house. I was hoping I would get in Gryffindor but it didn’t matter, I liked all of them but Slytherin. We all went up to the talking hat, just like it was in the book,and was assigned a house. I was put in Gryffindor. Hermione was my favorite character and she was also in Gryffindor, so that was pretty cool.

After everyone got sorted into their houses we walked to the woods on the grounds. They were trying to replicate the Forbidden Forest. We had to meet Hagrid. Hagrid was my mom’s favorite character. He lived right outside the forbidden forest in a small hut. Right before entering the woods, there was a wooden hut. A man with a beard walked out of it and greeted us as Hagrid. He told us before we entered the forest; we had to make our wands. With medium sized sticks, we were asked to decorate our wands. We all piled into the hut where there were small desks with stickers, glitter and paint waiting for us. We each grabbed a stick and went to our work station. My stick was a little shorter than the others but I didn’t care, this was my wand. I covered it in silver and pink glitter. Glitter was not only covering the wand, it was also covering me.

As we waited for our wands to dry, Hagrid told us about the dangers of Forbidden Forest and how evil lurks there. I remember from the books that Harry faced many troubles in the Forbidden Forest but he always got out alive, so I was confident I would too. With our glittery wands in hand we walked single file into the forest. I had been in Poricy part woods before, but being in my costume with my wand made seem it like I was transformed into the book. We had to find acorns and stuff or the potions we were going to make and other sticks back at the hut later in the day. We had to collect our things but also watch out for the weeping willow or other dark magic lurking in the forest. I clenched onto my pink wand thinking it could actually work, like it could protect me.

I still have my wand in my night stand. I must sound ridiculous even keeping the old glittery stick, but it’s always there, for my protection and a wonderful memory.

*I had to do an assignment for my creative writing class about an artifact I still have. I still am a Harry Potter nerd. I still love Hermione and I still have my cloak,hat and wand.*



Treasure Beneath the Dust.

For the last two weeks my friend Scott has been in California. Before he left, he asked me to watch and feed his cats while he was away. Since he’s been gone, they have become my entire life. I’ve grown so attached to these cats that I might cry when I leave them. They are like my children, its weird. I don’t think they have ever gotten this much attention in their lives. But I love them. I don’t have a cat  myself so this is as close to getting a cat as i possibly can for now. My mom is allergic and I am too ( I’ve been taking Benadryl for two weeks) but to me it doesn’t matter. They are the most cuddly creatures ever. It’s like you can tell they love you. I think it’s so cute.

But anyway, besides from feeding and taking care of his cats, I wanted to do something else. I decided I was going clean up a little while he was gone. As most of you all know, men are NOT the cleanest people in the world. There are some very meticulously clean and tidy men and if you have one of those, be grateful. I on the other hand, had to deal with the polar opposite. I’m not complaining that his apartment was worse than my room (it was) I’m simply saying that it was living proof that men need women in their lives. If they didn’t, they would living in a river of shit.

Mind you, I never clean. I’m not one of those people who clean the house for fun. My room is a mess but I try to be semi organized, I always get distracted when I clean my room and it never gets done. So cleaning this whole apartment was a HUGE accomplishment for me. Once I got to the apartment, I didn’t want to leave right away and might as well make myself busy so I cleaned, and of course read Bukowski during my breaks.

While I was cleaning, I found out so much more about Scott than I ever had before. His nerd level is at an all time high but besides that, I realized he enjoys the oldies but goodies, and the simple things. He keeps things that a heartless man would throw out. He cares about his family more than anything in the world ( Like most people) but I don’t know. I was just amazed how you can really figure out someone by just what they have in their house. I’ve also realized that this man has alot of baggage and even though he is very headstrong and pretends to be “Mr strong guy” I know he has a gentle soul and words bother him more than actions. You can break his arm and kick his ass and he’ll get up and fight back no problem, but tell him that he’s weak and he’ll crumble and never forget.

At times I am like that myself. I heard this quote a few days ago it went like “There’s always a little truth behind every ‘just kidding,’ a little knowledge behind every ‘i dont know,’ a little emotion behind every ‘i dont care,’ and a little pain behind every ‘it’s okay. I always blow things off when they hurt me because I don’t want to make waves. At times I just can’t take and I have to say something but I know the other person is just going to say “just kidding” or “it was a joke, you can’t take a joke” No, I can’t take a joke. Because if it wasn’t at least a little true, you wouldn’t have said it at all.

After cleaning and learning alot in this last two weeks, I’ve learned to appreciate people for who they are and what they like. I love a man who likes comic books and star wars but it doesn’t matter. They are called guilty pleasures. If one went through my room, they would find my hidden collection of backyardigans dolls and coloring books in my desk. I still to this day like to color, even though I don’t have many colors left.

I wonder what I will find when I clean my room, maybe I don’t like cleaning my room is because I already know who I am. Maybe someone would rather do it. I’d do it if I didn’t know myself inside and out. Maybe that’s why people become cleaning ladies. Who Knows.


Walking Books.

So yesterday I met this guy while walking in Riverside park with my friends. He was an interesting character to say the very least. When I walked passed him he was scribbling in a notebook, I had a feeling he was writer. I love meeting other writers. It doesn’t matter what they write, but in some sense they have the same mind set as me. Not many people have a creative mind, so when you meet people that do, its like a gold mine.

I guess I whisper really loud and he asked me if I wanted to read his stuff. I walked back and started reading his stuff. It was pretty good, but it wasn’t my style of poetry. I don’t really like things that rhyme, but that’s just me. I don’t like writing poetry with form because I personally am NOT a person of form. My other friends who are also writers came over and started talking to the guy. It was really awesome just meeting someone off the street and talking to them like you know them. I found out he was 20 and a big druggie and a writer. Most writers and college students are druggies so I wasn’t surprised or judgmental. He was telling us that he just applied to Brookdale. ( Point in my book) I started telling him about the creative writing club and he seemed to be really interested. I hope we recruited him.

Lately I was trying to form another writing group but I don’t know how I’d really start. It would be mostly adults. I want to join a readers group because I NEED to start reading, I feel I’m becoming illiterate. I am really trying to read this book called “Jay’s Journal”. It’s the sequal to Go Ask Alice. I really enjoyed Go Ask Alice, I read it in a day. This book on the other hand, I am having a difficult time getting through it. I am also reading Charles Bukowski’s Prettiest Woman in Town and other short stories. Those stories are strange I am telling you. There was this one story I read how the girl ( ironically named Sarah) was a witch and shrunk all the men to be 6 inches tall and than had sex with them. It was very strange.. I really don’t know where Charles Bukowski came up with this. Than there was another one that the girl was a robot and all she did was have sex with people. I mean wonder why Charles Bukowski only wrote about sex. Maybe his sex life wasn’t as great as he says it was. I say this because as a writer, we are all story tellers and liars.

If you guys know any good books, write them in the comment box. I must read more this school year. 2 books this summer is  a disgrace.


My Love For True Blood…

My love for True Blood is becoming a problem….

For the past month or so, my mom has started watching the true blood tv series. In the beginning she wouldn’t let me watch it because of all the nudity but I’m almost twenty years old, a little bit of tit isn’t that big of a deal. I told her that I’ve seen the human anatomy enough in my life to know and that seeing someones ass cheeks wasn’t going to disgust me.

In any HBO series there is always a ton of nudity. I think they just throw a pair of naked boobs in the show just because they can. But I’ve realized that most of the fabulous shows are on HBO and now that I’m old enough to #1 understand the concepts and #2 look beyond the nudity without laughing like a 10 year old, I’m starting to gravitate towards those kinds of shows.

Right now, my mom and I are watching the tv show called True Blood. It’s about Sookie Stackhouse a telepath, and her journey through life in her town of Bon Temps. This town is a vampire town where she meets her boyfriend “Vampire Bill”. This town has a vampire bar (Merlotts) that is owned by the extremely handsome shape shifter, Sam.This TV show  has sucked me in and made me love and hate each and every character. There are so many story lines in this one show that one would get confused but at some point, they are all connected together.

Before True Blood became True Blood, It was a book series by the author Charlaine Harris. I’ve never read these books but my mom has. She would highly recommend. This series is amazing because everything is described in great detail and you really get to know the characters in not just the show but the book themselves. My mother loved the books so much that she was thrilled when she found about True Blood.

I think all should watch True Blood, its an amazing show and the screen play is impeccably written…

I don’t usually watch TV series and I don’t usually like anything vampire-like ( ew Twilight) but this show is raw and gritty and in anything whether it be books are TV shows, that’s what I like. Fluff ( like Glee) shouldn’t be written or directed on television, I believe it doesn’t help the brain work. Also, the music soundtrack in this series in AMAZING.. I don’t really pay attention to the music ( I listen to the lyrics more so…) but this soundtrack for this show is awesome.. this show is going to go far.. I can already see it now..


Crystal Balls Don’t Tell You Much.

For the last few days, I have been thinking about my life. Throughout my entire life I have always had at least one friend that was remotely trouble. Yesterday my mom called me the puppy catcher because apparently 9/10 of my friends have now or had in the past had  some weird story or either into alcohol or drugs and trying to pull me down. I strangely think I am going to change these people. I don’t know what I am thinking.

I think I do this because these people need to see the greener grass on the other side. My life is wonderful, most of the time. I have a family that loves me, I have a job, I have supported friends, I have a goal in life and I have a guy in my life that I can depend on. I think my pretty good given the cards I was delt with. But within those positive aspects, they are woven with negatives. Negatives make you stronger. 

.If it wasn’t for negatives in my life I wouldn’t be the person I am today. I wouldn’t know lessons I know now if it wasn’t for it.As I look at old pictures of myself I wonder what it would  like to talk to the old me. To tell her things that she would need to know in the future. Ofcourse the past self wouldn’t understand, but atleast she could be prepared for it. 

I am reading a book called The Future of Us By Jay Asher and let me tell you, it is the most unbelievable mind boggling book i’ve ever read. I mean I’ve read some pretty good books in my life but this book makes me realy think about my actions more than any other book has before. The story starts when Emma ( class of 1997) gets AOL for the first time from her friend Josh ( whos she has known since forever) As she downloads AOL, Facebook comes up. Back in the late 90’s Facebook didn’t even exist. But as Emma looks through this unknown site, she realizes that Facebook is her future 30 years from that moment. With every action she makes, her future gets changed. 

As I continue to read this book ( im only on chaper 29) I wonder if my actions are changing my future. I wonder what I am doing even at this waking moment is changing my entire life.I would love to see my future for a split second, I want to see if I get what I want or make it to places I want to be.

If only I could see the future… that would be amazing.


Charles Bukowski: Born into This.

I Love this man more than words can describe.

Charles Bukowski is the greatest man ever lived. His writing made me think about men differently. It made me think about everything in my life. It made me think about being a writer, and my future. His writing style is not all “fluff”, its straight forward and to the point.
Charles bukowski’s book Women, is a book that made me understand the minds of men.How men who think of sex, and love differently than women do.
Charles Bukowski’s life is inspiring to me. I hope to become the writer Charles Bukowski was.

He makes me laugh, he makes me cringe, he makes me think, he makes me hope.

Thank you Henry Charles Bukowski. I appreciate it.

I love you, You dirty old man.

I hope he  inspires you, like he inspires me.


A Difficult Novel

You are extremely hard to read.

Your not a picture book

Like I am used to

You are an encyclopedia of secrets

As they live in each page of your heart

With each chapter password protected

There is no way I will ever know

Until you tell me first

So I can experience you

Just like you’ve experienced me

The turmoils

The random thoughts

The heartaches

As you listened to my work

Be a reflection of my heart

You got to know me

From cover to cover.

I wrote this a few weeks ago, I would write more but I am so beat. 

Tailgating + Jason Aldean/Luke Bryan Concert = a wonderful Saturday Night <3 

Women By Charles Bukowski.

I was reading this book titled  Women by Charles Bukowski today while sitting in the Applebees parking lot. I don’t usually read in parking lots (I’m not that weird) but I was waiting for my friend to get his tip share and it was taking FOREVER so why not?

When I read the first page I instantly got pulled into the book. I read quicker  then I usually do so I could read alot before he came back. As I continued to read, I became automatically attached to the main character of the book Henry. Like me, He was also a writer. He used to  stay up half the night every night to write. He was writing a novel. It took 21 nights to finish it. His goal was to write 10 pages a night. He would never know how many pages he wrote till the next morning. He would fall asleep at his computer everynight. As alcoholism began to take over him, he continued to write.

When reading this book, I began to understand why my friend was reading this. When it comes to women, the main character and my friend are the same person. They are both very straightforward. When they want to have sex with you, they will flat out tell you. With them, they weren’t going to run around it. I wish more people were like this. I hate playing the game. I hate the signs. If you want me to know something, then tell me. Flirting is like this. I hate flirting. The art of Flirting is stupid.

I wrote a poem about Flirting. It Explains why I hate it.


I don’t understand the art of flirting
Trying to entice the other to talk
Making them smile at every witty comment you make
Just so you can sleep with them. 
Is that how it is? 
Or am I just living  in this awkward world
Where words and tones turn people on
And make them sound intriguing. 
Flirting is something I will never understand
But in this strange world we live in
Its normal

The book Women is a book I NEED to buy and continue to read. I feel like I have left Henry in the back of his car. I want to hear about his life. I hope my books someday do this to people. The way the text is written is so straightforward its unbelievable,and there are no hidden meanings between the lines. I love that about this book. I feel like book is going to change me in some sort of way. It’s going to help me understand men more.

He has also written Ham on Rye and Post Office, which I have been also recommend to read. I kinda can’t wait to read Charles Bukowski’s books. His way of writing is something I have never seen before. It’s exciting to find a great author when you are a writer. I wish I could meet this man, but he unfortunatly died a year after I was born. I would tell him that his books have done something that no other book as ever done to me.It educated me just from the first page.

I can’t wait to read.

Sarah xo