An Ode to the Day

To the day before another day

 a special day

Where two people met for the first time

Where bonds were formed like muscles

and piercing cries echoed empty hallways.

Pale blue pant sets worn over street clothes

Protection of what’s to come.


She swears she won’t know what to do with it now

But she’ll figure it out with time.

By 21 she’s cried for 21 years on the same day

Because after today she can’t go back

and teach whats already been taught.


Candles flicker in a black room

and people smile,but her.

She knows that her baby has grown

and wont need her,but forever she will be there



Tomorrow is my Birthday, and every year I cry the night before. It’s a personal tradition I guess. I hate getting old.



To the Flower that Never Bloomed

I always think of you

That little seed, that never bloomed.

People try to relate

Wonder what it would be like

To sit there and say goodbye

To someone they never met

But loved unconditionally



Years have passed

But the history of you resonates

Every morning

Wondering what it would be like

If things were different

If he’d still be there

Or if he would have ran

Afraid of the power you hold


 But you will someday blossom

My flower

And you will make him happy

Because I know I was

when I had you in my vase




Close my eyes


The boats hitting against the dock

and the low hum the water

slow beating of the heart


hearing wind whistling

in our pink ears

heat soaked into my skin

by him.

Grabs my hand and I am cold


Wondering if this worth


Putting on the armor

swinging the sword

Preparing for being




Yes, I’ve realized I haven’t been around in a long time. I took an unexpected hiatus, hopefully I will be back now.



Sunday Train to Penn

To the man standing with me

Waiting for the 8:42 train that never existed, thank you.

I felt less stupid standing there. Before,

I thought of that girl who jumped in front

Of that train months back. How fast they whizz

Next to you and how they won’t stop even you lay

Across the tracks.


To the three teenagers sitting across from me

Your porkroll, egg, and cheese sandwiches smell

delectable. If I was either trashy or hungrier

I will pounce you and grab your sandwiches.

But don’t worry, I will just sit here and dream of Dunkin instead.


To the man yelling at his son two rows back

What are you going to do if your child touches

whatever you don’t want him to touch again?

Were you really going to hit him in public

or are you just using that tactic all parents use?

Because by 16 he’ll hit you if you even

try to lay a finger on him.


To the two annoying girls who took my original seat

I don’t give a shit about you sleeping

On a coffee table. I don’t care how many shots of tequila

you took last night. If I did as many as you said you did

I would be dead, and I’m not saying that

Because I’m a light weight.


To the women who sat down next to me

At the second to last stop

I’m intrigued as to why you picked

the empty seat next to me instead of sitting

somewhere else.Thank you

You made me feel less alone.

To that friend waiting for me at Penn station

I’m sorry.

– “Because I have so many things to do and all I want to do is take a nap.”-Andrew O’Hare.


the reasons.

You realized your life was over when she walked away

There was no time to grab her shoulder

To turn her around and smack her with your lips

There was not enough “I’m sorry”s in the world to fix this

She doesn’t want you now even though she thought

There wasn’t a world without you before

Too much time has passed and as you wait she falls in love

And gets everything you thought she deserved but was too scared

To give

She had never smiled so beautiful  or glowed so bright

When she was with you because she knew

It wasn’t forever even though it could have been

If she didn’t become a woman in one week

She cried harder then the worst of storms and you hid

Behind a stools and strangers to forget

One day she realized what she wanted

A quiet morning she left what she loved to move on

Running against the current she fought to not look back

But she was being sucked back like a vacuum that you were controlling

Pictures of regrets flashed into your head and you realized why

She wanted to go.

You let her

she is safe now

And you are a man

That will always be just




Thank you for everyone who clicks on my butterfly when they see it!





 Believe in the you that I believe in.

 Believe in the one you wanna be

 but are too scared.

The you that stood over people

who stomped you down with words

 that never mattered.

Who treated you the way they did

Because it was “cool”.

The you that kissed the wrong girls

But doesn’t regret, just laughs and turns red.

Believe in the you that thinks that they don’t have work

Everyday minute to make her happy.

Believe in the you that deserves to be happy

From the moment you wake up to the second

You lay that head on the pillow. The you that smiles

 loves deep.

Believe in the you I believe in

Because you are all I will ever need.

Quiet at the Bay

How has the differences divided us so?

How can you stand there when you know

You can’t turn back

 You can’t rewind.


Two paychecks shine in the street lamps

 And you feel the warmth draining

Out of you like blood and you are cold

Like the salt water of the bay.


The wind makes you feel the tears

Before they hit the cracks

 and seep into the past.

You wonder if it could have been fixed

if it could have been like every other time

where fights were resolved with cigarettes

and drugs.


Its your hands

the ocean is speechless and you stand there

wishing the stars could write something.



you walk

Leaving us in a small town

Littered with junk and memories

And two broken hearts.


Back to school, Back to writing.


I cry and you stand there

Like a pole lifeless you watch as I get transported back

to a place that had a locked door.

You watch as I rip the veil off my face

and become hollow.

Sunken in you see my bones

But I am too soggy like a wet rag to care.

Tug of war you watch as my mind and body

Pull my limbs like rope until I scream.Wide eyed

You tell me to go, that people are watching, people will think,

People will worry.

The headlights mark where I should be headed

 like a rock I do not budge. I sit watching whizzing

 cars fly down the street like fireflies and I wonder

If they would stop if I stood infront of them.

 what would you do? Watching streetlights hang

like falling stars you wish for another second,

another moment to  sit watch me sleep.



Alone in the Spotless Sky

Blood shot eyes look up at a spotless sky

Crickets quiet themselves enough to listen

Open there ears to hear the low moan of her

The outcry of help,regret.

But nothing would help her

Nothing ever could

The light in her soul has burned

And no love can find her in this

Spotless world.

20 years of waiting for someone to rock her


And only the breeze

Can keep her warm.


Saw of my writer friends yesterday, they always get me inspired. I feel like I need to practice, I’m losing my touch.